Eva Longoria is a Spitter

Posted by dingdans

December 13, 2007

It would seem that sex with Eva Longoria is fairly milquetoast, because newlywed husband Tony Parker has reportedly been cheating on her with a French model who doesn’t mind doing a little swallowing. According to Female First

Alexandra Paressant - who claims she met the 25-year-old basketball player at his wedding to the ‘Desperate Housewives’ actress in July - alleges she met Parker for sex at Paris’ Park Hyatt Hotel on September 29. Paressant told X17 Online: “He said that Eva, sexually speaking, does not want to do certain things. She does not want to make love in front of a mirror, does not like certain positions and thinks that sperm gives you acne.”

In her defense, maybe it’s Tony who’s the problem, not her. So Eva doesn’t like “certain positions?” Well, everyone knows that the French really only know two positions in the first place — “on their backs under a white flag” and “cheeks spread, begging the Germans to be gentle.” I’m sure it’s hard to orgasm with your partner sniveling and cowering and asking if it’s safe to come out now.

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